Why am I getting relationship anxiety?

Relationship Anxiety can mean lack of trust within the relationship, ROCD, retroactive jealousy, the inability to communicate, questioning every little thing. The list goes on..

People experience anxiety as a result of a problem in the relationship, and sometimes it's a problem that you are creating in your own mind, sometimes it's a problem that your partner's creating because they've been suffering in their own life, sometimes it is lack of communication or effort on both sides.

Why am I getting it? Why am I experiencing this? 

A lot of people suffer from attachment issues that stem from their childhood. Meaning, things that they will have experienced in their childhood that caused them a lot of pain.

People carry this pain through their adolescence and into their adult life. 

Of course as an adult, seemingly everything's fine. There's someone that you love, care about and you want to settle down with them or maybe you have already and are now experiencing Relationship Anxiety.

Here are 5 reasons why this might be the case:

1.Your Parents Left You or one of your parents left you. This can cause the child to believe that they are not good enough. 

You may have thought, “my mom or dad didn't love me enough to stay, I must not be good enough” or if your parents gave you up for adoption “my parents didn't love me enough to keep me and to look after me.”

2. Your Parents Argued A Lot. Do you remember times when your parents would argue and you would feel unsafe or upset? Would you try to break up the arguments or run away to your room and hide? Either way, this can absolutely affect how you view/feel and act in your relationship today.

3. Your Needs Were Not Met. If your parents had multiple children, worked a lot, did not prioritise you and your wellbeing as a child, although they may have meant well, beliefs such as “I am not good enough or lovable enough or worthy enough of my needs to be met” could very well have formed in those early years.

4.You Were Loved, But Conditionally. So you got the attention, the praise, the feeling of safety and security, the feeling of being good enough but only when you were performing well at school, or at sport, or doing as you were told by a parent/guardian.

5. You Were Pushed And Compared. At school or your home life.This will leave a child feeling that their best is never, ever good enough. 

It will leave them feeling like in order to find a little bit of self worth they must compare, compete and be better than everyone and anyone.

What happened when you were a kid growing up? How did it affect you then and how is it affecting you now?

Please watch the full video above for more details/information!

Thank you for reading:)